Ten Years

Last week we celebrated our tenth wedding anniversary. It came and went without a lot of pomp and circumstance. We felt loved and acknowledged the life we’ve built and are continuing to work on. It was just different than I had always imagined it would be.

We didn’t write our own vows, opting for the traditional ones instead. To be honest, I don’t actually remember our vows. There was something about richer and poorer, sickness and health, good times and bad, but as I was proclaiming these words while holding tight to my almost-husband’s hands, my heart was holding tight to a plan I had carefully crafted for our life ahead.

Read More

Grand Opening

Writing is hard. Every time I think I have a new idea, I open up my browser and see someone else has already written about it. Sure, they didn’t use my words, but the ideas are similar. Is there really ever anything new to bring to the table? 

I finished my writing workshop at the end of February. I met some really talented women and was encouraged by their bravery and honesty in their words. We shared openly and gave feedback kindly. I didn’t really want it to end. Not only did it provide community, but it also forced me to prioritize writing. I was in a great routine for six weeks. Then the workshop ended and I went right back to making excellent excuses as to why I wasn’t writing. I got sick. We were traveling. People were visiting. You know, life. 

Read More

A Coffee Shop Lesson

Today, I’m sitting at my favorite coffee shop on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, blaming an elderly couple for my lack of productivity.  I have a soy latte and the crumbs of a pretzel croissant I devoured with no self-control sitting on a plate next to my laptop.  Jackhammers are making their own ruckus music between piles of dirty snow outside.  Two baristas are going back and forth between conversations with each other and serving the sporadic stream of customers stomping in the door.  When I look out the window I see buildings across the street that are the kind that initially won my heart for this city -- weathered brick, chipped mint green paint on fire escapes, intricate detail wrapped like a ribbon half way up the side.  When the splash of a yellow taxi is waiting at the stop light in front of them, the picture is quintessential New York City – and I have to remind myself I’m here and not just looking at a post card.

Read More

Dear Norah

Dear Norah,

You started preschool this week.  Which is weird because I feel like I just found out I was pregnant with you like a month ago.  I don’t know what your vision of preschool has been, but it’s one of only two consistent things you have asked for over the past year.  (The other being a pony tail.  I’m sorry, sweetie.  If I could make your hair grow any faster, I would.  But that gift is just coming slowly, which I think is a gift to me.  I need to learn how to do hair before you have enough to do.)

Read More

Weeding & Finishing Journals

I have a problem.  It might not be viewed as a problem for others, but it’s a problem for me.  I’m going to call it “my unfinished journal” problem.  You see, I have an entire box (let’s be honest – several boxes) full of unfinished journals from throughout my life.  For as long as I can remember I’ve kept a journal.  And for as long as I can remember I have never filled all the pages of a journal.  I start out motivated, but if I miss a few days or weeks and then sit down to write again it feels like weeds have grown over and I’m just not a gardener so I let them grow, toss the journal in to a box and start fresh.  This blog is hanging on the brink of becoming yet another unfinished journal. And if I hadn’t told people about it I think I’d find a way to tuck it neatly in to a virtual unfinished journal box and let the weeds take over.

Read More